+13

My top personal priority is an enormous thinking task (the task of trying to recover from and reverse being erased from existence from the start). All the applicable resources for that task (time and my own mind) are usable now. 

+12

At least partly, the purpose of the preceding post is to remove any unease or discomfort because of the thought that I could be in an unease or discomfort or that I am losing the passing time. For that purpose it was intended for a different blog in order to be as much as possible closer to expressing my condition and beyond mere taking of responsibility for my position toward a situation connected to things mentioned here.      

+11

Are we really in a new year? Last year ran out like a weekend. Any other person with the free time of the unemployed and still his problem is the lack of time?   

+10

One may have a tendency to fill the gaps and complete perceived things to a familiar form and that is also applicable to behaviour. The like of this guy may benefit from that inclination unless there is conscious effort to counter it. I have not seen somebody supposedly trying this hard to correct something while he is that much still on its cause outside. If one looks carefully, it could be seen that the guy does not even pretend to change his behaviour to deal with something he did. No, he is higher than having his will restricted. He just deal with the effect of a bad thing he does and change the world to make it fit his behaviour. For example, to deal with spreading degrading things about a person he may make others degrade themselves without even bothering himself to stop.    

+9

Continuing from post +7
Couple of days ago it occurred me the view of how much of this guy's trials where he already had more than sufficient signs to the contrary is just like a direct psychotic fighting of reality through denial except that it is done in a more artistic way that may even gets praised for an apparent conforming to reality instead.    

+8

One day I may, I don't know, hire an architect, a physicist or buy two adjacent houses like where I live and keep testing, if I can, just to see how can the cockroaches communicating things to this rat hear what I could be standing in a crammed waiting line of people, or the cockroaches themselves, and nobody would hear, let alone count anything as unusual.     

+7

continuing from the preceding post

It is also far from normal expectations how much this guy tries things that do not fit, working from a high position and treating things like playing with toys as if trying to debase the target by this undervaluating behaviour and not because he really believes in the probability of success. He may deal with matters superficially positioning them and related things lower than him by ignoring their potential depth. The good news is that what I remember suspecting from others playing this game with reality in a much more subtle way, this guy made it easy to see through their covering because of the intensity he shows.